Betty's Story
Betty's story....
On herself...
I used to work at an education centre. I was there for a number of years, in catering, until about six years ago. One of my sons was killed and I couldn't go back to work. Then I was just getting back on my feet, when my other son, Kevin, had his injury. My job now is to look after Kevin, I think.
On Kevin...
I got involved with Headway through my son, Kevin. Kevin was in a very bad car accident in 2006, aged 22. He was down at Dun Laoghaire for 14 weeks. When he came home we were waiting and waiting for someone to ring to say that he had some rehabilitative help. So a friend over the road put us in contact with someone in Tipperary who she thought may be able to help. But we were not in her district, so she gave us the phone number of Headway Helpline.
Within a week or ten days, one of the staff came out to visit Kevin. He was going backwards after all the hard work he'd done in Dun Laoghaire and there was no way forward for him. She suggested that Kevin came out to Limerick for some sampling days, maybe just two or three days, to see how he liked it. He went to Headway in Limerick for three days a week for the first four months, starting on the Rehabilitative Training programme.
The problem was how was he going to find his way in and get back to Martinstown? Limerick is 30 miles, my husband was at work and I can't drive. So I started going in on the 7.30 bus with him down and walk him down to the office, go round the town, spend some time in the church, go round the shops, and then bring him back up to the bus in the evening. I did that for the first four or five weeks, but there was no way I could keep going like this. But that's what he was going to Headway for - to be independent. So my husband dropped him at the bus, he got down to Limerick on his own, but I was worried how he was going to get from the bus station. So one of the staff used to walk him to and from the bus. That went of for about four weeks. And after that he would go on his own. And it was the best thing I did - to let him go. If I hadn't I would still be travelling with him in and out.
So since January he's been coming to Headway for five days a week. He's now on the Bridging Programme, and I hope that it will work out for him. But sometimes he gets so tired, but I've got to be positive. But he has come on so much!
Before the accident he was going to college, doing accountancy, he was in his second year, and he was working part time to give himself pocket money. You know, all of his life, of all my children, he was the one that had his whole life mapped out. He was a great planner, and he had all these high hopes for himself. And then everything was gone in a minute.
He is finding the programme very good, and seems to be enjoying it, he gets on great with all the people on the programme. He is planning on going back to college, to do a Business course. And he wants to go back driving. He wants to do his placement in an office. He is very good on the computers and things like that, which is a very useful skill.
On fundraising...
I'm not a member of the fundraising committee, but I was at a fundraising meeting one evening at Headway in Limerick. And I got to thinking, and thought it would be good idea to hold a coffee morning. So I didn't advertise it anywhere, but just asked people, word of mouth, and every person I asked, came. Every single person...and they were giving fifties, and twenties...I was absolutely stunned! And you know, I feel so good for doing it. The coffee morning was definitely a success.
Then my friend, who is a hairdresser and runs Hair Flair in Limerick, raised over €1000 for Headway. She was doing my hair, and she was saying about Kevin, everyone always asks about how he's getting on, and she decided to do the fundraising.
I'm also a member of Ballinureela Ladies' Club, and they had a sweepstake on the Grand National, and raised €200 for Headway. They decided they wanted to do some fundraising for a charity and I said about Kevin.
On life and the future...
You don't really know people until you need them, and everybody has been so good and so caring. People are still very close-knit in communities around Limerick, everyone tends to help out. People are always asking about Kevin.
My daughter Eleanor is going to do some fundraising: she's going to do the mini-marathon this year sometime. And I'd like to do a sponsored walk, just on my own. I can do that at my own pace.
With the Ballinureela Ladies' Club we meet once a month, and we've had a dog show, flower show, bingo, ...we have a very big programme. And then at Christmas we have a night out, a lovely big meal, and we go for a day out shopping. You know a lot of little things too - people come to do jewellery and floral art. It's something to go to, something to do. You see a different side of people - people you'd know but you wouldn't be close to. It's amazing. It's a month, and it's lovely.
I feel that, with Headway, you can pick up the phone anytime, and they'll explain everything in detail - they'll never rush you. They encourage you.